Picking Up The Pieces

A love so true, a love that has not lost its meaning even through the years seems to suddenly fade. A love she thought would end up in the altar. A love turned sour after making her fall so deeply. After all these years, after all what she has given up, suddenly she found herself all alone – yearning for the love that is now slowly drifting away. The pain is still fresh and alive, she’s still in the stage of denial. She was aware that moving on takes time. The great deal is, how painful taking the steps toward acceptance.

She started playing paintball hoping that all the pain would go away. Although it’s a fun activity, the pain still lingers around and she still feels the sting. For a while she would squeal and shout as the paintball capsule hit her but suddenly she would come to her senses and realize she is in her own. Reminiscing about the days with him are the worse when she realizes it is gone forever. The fondest times she shared with him. This is the torture upon ending a relationship, memories. Moving on is just like wishing to have a dreamless sleep. When everything seems to be fine, recalling can ruin it all. Imagining the pain dripping like the paint, it would hurt as it hits you but as it drips, it dries out. Like the paintball which is deliberately shoot by the opponent to win the flag.

Recovery is on its way, because she realizes that every dripping ends drying up. And as it dries up, it becomes a part of you that can’t be erased. This is the hardest way to learn lessons about life and love. You have to let the pain sink in first, before having the golden price. She is trying to cope up and I know how painful it is to her. Heart breaking experiences are intended to be dealt alone. Some have tried to make her feel better, but she still feels the pain inside. This is the sad part of parting ways; there are two hurting individuals that are suffering from loneliness. She could not stand to be alone but in the paintball field she could. Now, playing paintball becomes her therapy. Healing is a process we are all familiar with. She has to take the staircase one at a time, there’s no shortcut to healing. She is on her way to picking up the pieces of herself. She is taking her time. She would have to spend a lot of time healing herself. There are different parts of her personality that takes great time to heal. And soon she will able to find the last piece of herself and would be able to stand up again. The moment she attained the stage of redeeming her whole self, there’s a total transformation. There could be a difference is how she acts and what she thinks about life. However, a stronger person ready to fall in love again is on her way. No one can stop her, because she’s standing on her best.

Mitchell Perry regularly writes for

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